Day #82

On my way to work last night the snow was fairly heavy.

Then it quit and I have not seen anymore as of this point. It is nearly 5 AM....

5:45 AM Update - I just got an email from the Duluth News-Tribune warning me snow and blizzardlike conditions. It's still not snowing here, though...

Day #81

Well, after 81 days, the last I heard is that Livingston is still in Texas and yes, once again the snow is about to fall...

Day #80

Big, round, base-10 number alert!!

They happen.

Day #79

For some reason I've got the Jimmy Buffett song "Livingston's Gone to Texas" running through my head.

Nothing here is different
Nothing's changed at all
Livingston's still in Texas
The snow's about to fall

That's not a bad thing, of course.

Day #78

Once in a while I do question WHY I am keeping this day-count-thing going.

Day #77

...as the days continue to waltz on by...

Day #76

Hey! That was my old football jersey number!

Something happened that year, also...

Day #75

I mentioned before that it shouldn't be a matter of willpower that is stopping me from drinking.

Allow me to explain.

I will agree that willpower is a hell of a thing. Frankly, my willpower is a fairly strong feature of mine.

Willpower is an active descriptor to me. It's not something that can be put forth easily in my mind to describe a non-action for me. "I'm not drinking something that is chemically similar to some type of intoxicant" really isn't all that active a sentence.

So I do not like using the term willpower to describe what has happened. I do like the term vigilance, though.

That's what it should be described as.

Day #74

Feeling relatively OK, apparently.

Day #73

It was interesting to talk to some people about what's going on.

I went to lunch yesterday with Steve. Stopped and talked to Lisa yesterday.

Fun, fun.

Day #72

As I mentioned before, it is amusing to recognize the triggers that used to drive me.

Amusing and sad in some ways.

Day #71

There are times when I remember some of the really good triggers and want to get some serious drinking going.

Then I remember that it isn't an option anymore and I feel better, actually.

I'm assuming that's a good thing.

Day #70

Funny to read my own thoughts once in a while...

Day #69

One of the things that I find amusing is how people react to me just being normal at this point.

After all, I always was a serious-type person.

That was the way I was before I drank.

That was the way I was when I learned how to drink.

I am still a somewhat serious-type person since I've given up drinking.

Funny how a little bit of behavior modification doesn't change everything, hmmmm?

Day #68

Perfectly fine in a lot of ways today, I guess...

Regarding Willpower

Read the original here:

Dr. Dave: Bill, here's a letter to us from Mona, who's 34 and already twice divorced -- both times from drunks. "You know what's wrong with men in America?" she writes us. "All this talk about addiction being a 'disease' -- which is just some lefty, liberal, new-age babble put out by people like you two. What's wrong is that it keeps men from developing a backbone, and taking responsibility for their lives, their families and marriages. Even AA says people who drink suffer from a character defect. Meaning they're morally weak and deficient in willpower, right?"

Bill: Mona, let's talk about willpower. Take an alcoholic or drug addict without a penny in his pocket. Deposit him, friendless and alone, in a blue-nose town (like the old-time Philadelphia that W.C. Fields used to bemoan). Dump him there at 6 a.m. Sunday morning, broke and hungover, the bars and liquor stores closed. He'll find a way to get high before noon. That's willpower.

That's comedy...

Day #67

There is some contemplation regarding willpower and an earlier question taking place as you read this...

Day #66

Well...At least the weather is improving...

Day #65

It was an odd realization that I had last night.

The stroke was actually the final "soft" landing I had.

It had gotten to the point for my body that the only "hard" landing left for me was actual death, I think.

Just a nice thought I had...

Day #64

If it turns out to be a matter of willpower now that would make it a bit easier for me...

Day #63

No real urge to end the current streak at this point.

That's a good thing, I suppose...

Day #62

It is nice to know that the aggravation is still pretty easy to get even after I've done the quitting thing...

Day #61

...and all is well in that regard for today.

I am getting that whiny feeling about the walking-thing since the stroke, but that's how it gets better later.

It's just that I learned how to walk on the old legs over the course of 40+ years and it's a pain to start that stuff over...

Day #60

As has been said, here's to today.

Yet another day in a continuing series of days...

Day #59

The way that a lot of people think when they first attempt to quit drinking is that they want to quit drinking forever.

That would be just like walking into a barber shop and asking for the last haircut you will ever need. Regardless of how short the hair gets, it will grow back.

That's why the quitting drinking thing is a one day at a time thing.

It has to be...

Day #58

There it goes!

It Happens...

The odd bits of nostalgia that happen led me to copying this signature from my copy of the big book:

Find your center of your center; when your there don't forget the middle of the end of where you started to be when you got here because you don't want to go back to the start of the end again.

I don't see how it could be clearer than that.

Coming Soon...

I'm going to type a little bit from a book of meditations that was given to me.

Kind of funny.

Day #57

So far, so good...

Day #56

By the way, I guess...

Half the Battle

Once the joke is realized, the rest is darned easy.

That's all I can say about that.

When Duke was a Zombie...

If anyone remembers when Zombie Duke (Renamed Legume!) was driving Rick Redfern to the airport in the comic strip Doonebury, any assistance would be appreciated...

Day #54

One of the (many) things I have been getting used to is the hyper-reflexive state of the right side of my body.

It makes me walk funny, for now...

That Other Thing...

I do need to keep paying attention to and tracking is my blood pressure.

It's 133/72 today.

Nearly human!

Day #53

Still not a problem, though overconfidence needs to be watched for and put down quickly...

That and this continuing sickness...Yick.

Day #52

Seven days out of treatment.

Things are going about as well as I expected, I guess, except for the unexpected illness.

I guess I'll make it through today...